Where dirty flash fiction becomes flash friction...

'The Seduction of Captain Birds Eye'

Having weighed anchor, and seated next to the Captain at the banquet table, Audrey made her move. 'Shiver me timbers!' he exclaimed, as long fingernails brushed his thigh before deftly unzipping him.

'Icebergs!' he squealed and shuddered, as cold palm polished his member, his knee reflexively banging against the underside of the table.

The salty sea dog went on the offensive - just as he learnt when chasing some Moby Dick action at the start of his seafaring career as a cabin boy - whispering 'Buried treasure!' as his trembling hand opened Audrey's oyster.

'You'll have to taste my local delicacy' giggled Audrey, bringing the foreplay to an abrupt close, as the disappointed sea man lamented 'I'm sick of fish fingers'.